May 31, 2009

"So late!"

Let me continue basically in the same theme of my last post (I may continue in my next post too).

Talking about having children, let me share you a bad experience. I think many of you may also have had similar experience.

After marriage, we (two) decided to wait a few years before having a child. We thought of having some stability and maturity first. But it didn't seem to be 'our matter' only. After a year, people started talking about our not planning child. Some of them even started suspecting that one (or both) of us must be having some 'problem' and for that we were unable to have a child. Even some of our closest relatives started talking that way. I knew our society sneaks and gossips too much on someone's private life but didn't know it was this much intense.

Our society is obsessed with having child, and that too very early after marriage. I don't think our education has much changed that as some of my very educated friends didn't 'wait'. I think a couple of years without children will be better to create a good bonding between the husband and wife. That is even more necessary in our society where arranged marriage is still the norm and to-be-spouses don't know each other before marriage. Having a child is not a bad thing but with it come all the necessities and tensions too. So it doesn't harm to wait a couple of years and have a good talk between the "two".

We had Aryaa around 5 years after our marriage. For our family, it was "so late!" a relief..

Image Source:Birdwatcher's

Image Source:DesiHotMasala

4 comments:

Neeti Aryal Khanal said...

In my case, some commented, we had shubham too early. he was born three days before our marriage anniversary. There is so much pressure on couple to have children. I agree with you about having some years so that couple know each other before commiting to challenge of parenthood

badri said...

Basanta jee good posting,
After 2-3 years of marriage may be better to have a child.

Nirmla Kapila said...

very true but parents have their own experience they think that childrenbe adjusted with in their service or upto that period when they bodily and mentaly are fit in india same is the situation a good post to read the mind of todayS youththanx a lot

Basanta said...

Thank you all for your kind comments!

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